Hello and welcome to my blog! It’s amazing to have you here.
I wanted to start this blog as a space to share the ups and downs of living with complex mental illness as well as chronic pain whilst also being a mum in a same sex marriage.
So, a bit about me. My name is Emma, I’m 29, from South west London. I live with my wife Jocelyn, my step son (E) who is 12 years old and my son (J) who is 18 months old. We also have a lovely, if not rather mischievous, black cat called Max.
I am currently a stay at home Mum who is figuring out who and what she wants to be. For the past year and a half my whole life has been dedicated to looking after this gorgeous small bundle of screaming, crying, pooping joy who has been solely reliant on me for survival. Being a new mummy can quickly become your entire identity and so when your baby progresses into a toddler with more independence it can feel a bit like rebuilding your identity separate to them from scratch. For me, that prospect is pretty overwhelming!
I have mental health problems which have had a significant impact on my life for a really long time. Thankfully, I’m not in the horribly bad way I used to be but life still has its difficulties. I’m still plagued by distressing times where my experience can feel unbearable. However, being a mum has definitely helped me become more stable and fight even harder than I was before so that I can bring my son up in a safe home with a loving family.
I live with a condition known as Dissociative identity disorder which stems from childhood trauma. I have also had a long battle with self harm, an eating disorders and psychotic symptoms such as auditory and visual hallucinations.
I hope by making this blog I can help someone to feel less alone and can aid understanding about what it’s like to live with a variety of difficulties thereby reducing the stigma around these issues and maybe even providing some handy tips to cope with these conditions.
Thank you so much for reading and I hope you read our future posts.